Monday, August 24, 2015

The Beginning of the End...

Last Thursday was the first day of my 3L, and final year of law school! I can't believe after all of my hard work, and all the sacrifices we've made over the past few years that we've finally made it to this point.

The past two years have flown by, and also been painfully slow at the same time (I understand that that makes absolutely no sense but it's just the truth)

I've spent the better part of the past two years stressed out, tired, frustrated, and lonely. But I wouldn't trade a moment of Law School, or of my life here for anything in the world.

I've made some of the best friends I have ever had here, I've learned so much about the world, and so much about myself. I've grown, I've changed, and I've matured.

Being a Law student has made me a better multi-tasker, arguer, reader, and made me better at running on very little sleep. It's also made me a better person, and a more confident woman.

However, I've been a horrible friend, daughter, blogger, and wife. For two years I've put school first and everything else second, I've neglected everything and everyone that matters to me and I've let my personal life spiral out of control one to many times. R and I put our personal goals and dreams behind my professional ones, and put off having children even though we both want to be parents more than anything in this world (and certain parents of ours aren't helping by making it known how badly they want grandchildren).

Some day's I regret it, I really really do. I wonder if I made a mistake. I wonder if I would have been better off sticking with teaching, after all if I had stuck with teaching I'd be a teacher now, and R and I would already have our family. We'd be established instead of just getting started. We'd be home with our families instead of over an hour away.
But then I remember that I would also be miserable.
I hated teaching, my clinical courses were the worst times of my life.

I remember that I'm doing this for our future, for our future children, so that we can live a better life. I'm in Law School so that future will be better than it would have been otherwise, I'm here because being a Lawyer gives my life a purpose, because advocating for those who can't advocate for themselves is all i've ever wanted to do.

And Last but most certainly not least....

Law School makes me happy, I love the Law, and if I can live my life doing what I love then there is absolutely nothing wrong with that!

First day of school pictures are so much fun... I wish my parent's had thought to take them when I was growing up, but being a single Mom my Mama had a lot more on her plate than taking a picture of me on the first day of school... you know like putting food on the table and making sure we had a roof over our heads. But that's beside the point, where I was going with that was as fun as they are, I'm super glad that this is my last year of taking a back to school picture because in May I will be a #DoneL, in July I'll take the SC Bar Exam, and in November (God willing, and luck on my side) I'll be admitted to the South Carolina Bar and {finally} be able to practice law! 
(Also, I am not sure if it's the lighting on my 3L picture or what by my face looks wrong. I don't think I really look like that)

2 comments:

  1. You are a treasure and I am very proud of you! I am glad that you're pursuing your dreams! So excited for you!

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